Dont You Love Your Daddy?
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You're going through an incredibly stressful time.
It's understandable that you might feel like blowing your top when you hear the "why" question for the billionth time. Divorce is confusing to a child. Your child may seem to get it one day and be unsure the next. His mind is trying to adjust to his new reality. Consider your audience. The same guidelines that apply to other sensitive topics such as sex apply here.
Give an age-appropriate answer to your child's questions, keeping in mind that a younger child needs fewer details than an older one. Long-winded answers can confuse a child, so keep it short and stick to whatever script you and your ex have agreed on: "Mom and Dad fight too much, so we decided to live apart. Answer honestly. Children should be spared certain information, such as details about a parent's infidelity, but they do deserve truthful answers. For instance, if you're still negotiating a custody arrangement you might say: "Your dad and I are still working on that.
What I do know is that you will get to spend lots of time with each of us.
You will be the first to know as soon as we have this figured out. Don't overshare. Take care to answer just the question asked, especially when talking to a younger child. A 3-year-old asking why Daddy or Mommy is gone needs only to know that because Daddy and Mommy are getting a divorce, each of you will be living in your own homes now.
Meyer says. You're numb at first, then suddenly you find yourself sinking into a pile of quicksand. You want to scream, but you're buried so deep; you continue to suffocate until all you see is completely black. That is what envy, rejection, and disappointment feel like. That is how much those emotions kill you. I get it. I understand that for whatever reason, you feel unloved by the one who is supposed to love you the most - by the one whose genes gave you personality and life.
To The Daughter Who Has Never Felt Loved by Her Daddy
He wasn't there to encourage you or offer emotional support. He said he loves you, but why should you believe him? Is that what love is? Is love manipulation? Is love supposed to be this confusing?
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Because one second he tells you how much he loves his little girl and the next minute he continues to neglect, abuse, and scar. Actions speak louder than words. He never kissed you goodnight and tucked you into bed. He wasn't at your birthday parties or school graduations.
He was too busy wrapping his head around other things to satisfy his own insecurities, trying to find happiness in other things - things nowhere near as satisfying as his beautiful daughter. Maybe he chose alcohol or drugs or addictions over you. Whatever it may be, here you are, left scarred and scared, never able to trust any man because the man who was supposed to be your dad gave you no reason to trust him.
Why is that? Why is it that the beautiful, talented, priceless, amazing girl like you didn't get the love she needed from her dad? I don't know why dads abuse their children. And I am so sorry if you fall into that category.
It's okay to be scared. The rejection and disappointment you're feeling is valid. Why don't you care?
He slammed the door in your face. Either way, that hurts. A lot. When you were a child, the decisions regarding the relationship with your daddy were made by adults. Now that you are an adult - now that you understand - YOU make those decisions.
You decide how you want the relationship to be. You deserve that. I'm sure you felt like your childhood was taken away from you. Whatever It Takes. Parkland: Birth of a Movement eBook.
Mommy and Daddy
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